Venting about the lack of female bromances, Joanna O’Malley puts out a come and get me plea to all readers
As a person of the double X chromosome variety, I must confess I’m upset. Upset that I, as a female, cannot have a bromance.
Let me clarify, I do have friends, but can only refer to close female friends as ‘gal pals’ or ‘my bessie mate’. My guy friends already have that special someone with whom they can be bromantic.
The only person who I’d refer to in almost every conversation, hug every half an hour or share lingering glances with while singing along to one of the many songs we both know from our vast repertoire is my boyfriend, and that’s lame.
The real question is, why can guys share intimate moments and call it harmless ‘guy love,’ but when girls do the exact same action with one another it’s considered weird or homoerotic. Both men and women have shot down this argument, saying that women can indeed have a bromance, but they generally tended to be the Sex and the City type.
My personal view on the matter is that, as a gender, we’re too quick to judge and compete with one another. We are indeed our own worst enemy. When we see a woman comedian, we complain that they are not actually funny and that all they do is complain about their lives. Yet when we see male comedians we tend to believe that they can do no wrong.
This communal thought translates in to the world of bromance. Women tend to be quicker to be judged and slower to be forgiven. It’s no wonder legitimate bromances for women are few and far between.
Upon searching for the female name for a bromance, I discovered that the name of such a friendship indicates ‘slutty’ behaviour and negative connotations. Names for the female bromance included; ‘hoemance’, ‘lesbifriends’ and ‘scissor sisters.’ We are basically discouraging a carefree and silly relationship with fellow members of the female gender.
The desire for a bromance doesn’t stem from some sort of feminist viewpoint. It stems from TV shows advertising the male friendship as being something that’s adorable as well as thoroughly amusing.
There may be hope though. Even though it’s very rare, the female bromance does indeed exist as Amy Poehler and Tina Fey show us. I wait in optimistic hope that my perfect bromance could be out there waiting to embrace with me while shouting ‘hug me sister.’