Games: Unnecessary accessories

 
 

From a $100 World of Warcraft mouse to the Wii golf club, Joe Murphy takes on pointless gaming accessories

After scouring the archives of game consoles from retro to new age, the most pointless of all accessories has come only in recent times. From the NES glove to the eye toy for PS, nothing has made less sense in the gaming world than the Wii steering wheel.

This popular contraption is used in games such as Mario Kart so you gain a more realistic feel for the gameplay and an even more accurate steering sensation. Of course, what could be more realistic than cartoon mushrooms becoming professional race car drivers?

Basically, these driving games require you to hold the controller horizontally and tilt it from left to right in order to steer your car in the appropriate direction. Now with this 20 odd euro steering wheel, we can slot the controller into a large plastic circle in order to do what? Oh that’s right, the exact same thing. My advices, get some plastic, bend it into a circle and sellotape your controller to it. Problem solved and €20 saved.

Companies like Nintendo create these useless products all the time and we buy into it as their advertising makes us all want to look just as cool as Ant and Dec do when they’re playing against fiveyear-olds on their TV ads.

And the madness doesn’t stop there. Wii Sports also has a tennis racket, and a giant dart which do pretty much the same thing as the steering wheel. Quite frankly, these devices offer nothing to enhance your gameplay. Although the creators may claim that the weight of the accessories increases accuracy of gameplay, I for one will not be convinced that swinging my arm in front of sensors will be made easier the more ridiculous I look with fake sporting equipment.

My forecast for the future is that one of these days we’ll have a Wii archery bow that can be used to fire the Wii dart. At least that way we can have a new way to fling the controller at the wall when some Koopa whoops our asses, or when Link refuses to do what we tell him. I’m still waiting for the Cooking Mama Wii Whisk attachment; to add realistic weight to the fake pancakes you spent all day making. Just 20 more euro and you’ll finally feel a sense of achievement.

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